620+ Card Pickup

As I continue to locate current addresses for all, I have tried to be cognizant of the horrible storm damage left behind by Irene, and tried not to bother folks in the affected states. Well, hoping against hope that our classmates were lucky enough not to live in a floodplain or on a riverbank, I started to call folks in Wayne and surrounding areas and in New England with a few West Coast and Florida folks thrown in the mix too.

So I called Judy Wackwitz Gerasimenko, who recognized me, spoke long enough to say she wanted in the directory and to let me know that although she was done wading in water, she was now wading in contractor estimates for repairs to her home, so she couldn't chat and didn't know when she would be back on line to send a current photo. I thanked her, wished her good luck and went on my way. I also spoke with Janice Peck Klear who was somewhat surprised to hear from me, thought the directory was a great idea and wanted to be listed. Sometimes it is like holding a deck of 620+ cards and tossing them in the air and picking them at random to try and locate or call. Just like the old "52 card pickup" game. You push the calls into the pipeline and then you get calls or emails back. It took a second to realize to whom I was talking, but I finally came out of the fog and talked to Donna Hohnarth Van Lenten who was of immense help and just flooded me with names and possible locations for folks.

Almost forgot that I had talked with Mike Scalzo last week who rather sadly mentioned that his best friends, Ron Haggar and John Iraola were gone and that he hadn't really been in touch with anyone else since their passing. I suggested being listed in the directory might change that and he agreed. It's pretty much the same story for many. You have people you were close to. Now you are either still in touch with 40+ year friendships, or you've lost touch and don't know if it was your fault or not and so even if you had contact information you don't know if you should get in touch because of embarrassment or some other self perceived blame or fault. Been there, done that. Make the call. Send the email. I can't say it enough - there were reasons you were friends in the first place. Unless either you or they have changed and become completely different people, those reasons are still there. Once the directory is up and on line, you'll have that choice to make. Choice is good, for the Class of '67 and good for you.

Different Kinds of Sadness

Amid all the fun and conversation, amid the satisfaction of discover and location, other voices spoke out over the weekend that made me pause and think back to our high school experiences and whether or not our nostalgia has not hidden some uglier truths.

I have often made mention that I know that there are classmates who do not share our perspective on school, but I was never made more aware than when I called someone who shall remain nameless. Her first reaction was one of suspicion. She asked me how I had come to find her phone number. I replied through an Internet people search engine. She went on to relate how her high school experience was horribly different. Instead of it being one of the best times of her life, she described it as years of humiliation during which emotional and intellectual bullying were the norm and she always felt as though she could expect a new round of victimization at any time from people whose egos were far bigger than their character. So I should keep what she called "your friggin' high school" so she could continue to try to forget it forever". Wow. I was so shocked I didn't even get a chance to think to ask her if she felt I played a role in any of this. I felt so badly I was prepared to apologize for behavior I never engaged in, since I had little if any contact with her in school. By the time these thoughts were even formed in my head, and before I could utter them, I was already listening to dead air. I know that bullying in many ways and forms has become an everyday presence in today's schools, but it never occurred to me that I could have looked back to my own high school to find it. Was I so blind as not to see it? It was the kind of reminder I got from Al Piaget in Anthony Wayne after I delivered a research paper about segregation and civil rights in the Deep South. His comment on the margin was "you don't have to go any further than South Jersey migrant workers to find the same thing". Right in your own back yard.

After that, it was certainly much easier to accept that several other classmates decided not to be listed fully in the directory, one because he didn't actually graduate with us but from another school, from where his fond memories arose; one because he got kicked out before graduation; and one simply because he felt no connection to anyone in school. I simply wished them well and congratulated them for finding their place in the world.

Finally, two other items: The first, a request from Nancy LaRue's son, who was only 10 months old when she passed in Beatrice Nebraska in 1969, that anyone who was close to Nancy in school let him know their impressions of her. He never had the chance to get to know her and hoped her classmates might let him know what kind of person she was. You can post to Facebook or let me know by email so I can forward your thoughts along. I also posted this request to Facebook and thanks to those who have already posted comments.

Second, also posted on Facebook and the reunion site, please note the passing of Laura Casadevall Robinson on August 31, 2011 after a 3-1/2 year fight with cancer. A USAF Vietnam veteran, Laura will be buried this afternoon in Jacksonville National Cemetery with full military honors and will be listed as such in the directory memorial section.

Tempest in a Teapot Part II in More ways than One

In the wake of Hurricane Irene, we Hoosiers viewed the events in complete safety and sunshine. It was with great relief that the storm did not meet expectations as we thought about my East Coast classmates who were in the path of the storm.

It wasn't the only tempest in the picture however. Once again, the issue of privacy rears its head. Our thought was that many have over the years lost their yearbooks and would like to have a copy of their senior pictures with Facebook as the delivery vehicle. While no one has a problem with their pictures published permission on the Class reunion site, which have been on the Internet for over 5 years, suddenly it's an issue on Facebook. Seems that my posting high school pictures to classmates, which initially began amidst a great swelling of good feelings and fond memories has been tainted with suspicion and paranoia. Privacy is apparently defined differently in different quarters.

Again, I emphasize that this negativity will not affect the completion of my project which involves two activities, one, finding and contacting everyone in the class, and two, publishing a complete class directory, less the few who have opted not to participate.

It's just a shame that something that was meant to get people thinking about high school and the passage of time and attending the Reunion has become a bone of contention, another tempest in a small teapot, unlike Irene, the real Tempest in a much larger realm.

Despite these little harassments, we continue on. We heard from Patty Parkin Carr and suggested she give Carol Vanderway a call since they hadn't spoken for years. We haven't heard from Noreen West yet, but when we do, we'll see if we can't reconnect each of them with each other. Got a call out of the Blue from Earl Newman, out in  Los Banos, CA. I resisted the temptation to suck information from him since he spent half his career maintaining and repairing RVs. I also got a return call from Ed Dickenson another of our classmates in the ministry in the San Diego area.

I had a rollicking chat with Deborah Galesi who lives in Kihei, Maui, Hawaii. She has become an accomplished and classically trained artist (not to mention free spirit) and she promised to share a sunset with us on her west facing lanai the next time we were on Maui, one of our favorite vacation spots.

But as though there were some cosmic balance in the world for all this happy news, we were saddened to run into death listings for Diane Finnegan (2008) and Ed Miller (2002).

So even as Irene takes a parting shot at New England, and we warn the recently retired George Dingfelder in Maine to batten down his hatches, we hope this most recent obstructionist privacy snit will blow over and everyone can get on with good times, good memories and reconnecting with classmates.

Delivery Status Notification (Failure)

It has been an interesting couple of days since we "Unofficially" announced the Wayne Valley 67 Class Directory. We've amassed a great deal of data, found or confirmed many classmates' whereabouts and are now starting to contact everyone either by Facebook, email or postcard or phone. Unfortunately, many of the emails we inherited from the 40th class reunion attendance directory bounced back. Even though it takes longer, cause I can't NOT talk once connected, I still prefer the phone.

Also experienced an interesting phenomenon immediately following the earthquakes of this past week. No emails went through to the East Coast and we had to resend them all. My sister, who lives in the DC area said that the widespread overloading of the internet and cell phone systems was a real revelation after all the vendors had assured the government that they would assure continuous operations after 9/11. NOT.

Talked to Doug Fowler up in Nashua NH. Had a fun talk with him. Also had a great conversation with Ken Coyle who has been a teacher and coach forever in Tempe AZ. I also got a chance to congratulate him for his induction into the WV Football Hall of Fame, which I've been meaning to do ever since Bob Sherger told me about it weeks ago, I'm embarrassed to say. Also had a chat with Carol Vanderway in South Jersey which I presume is battening down their hatches in anticipation of Hurricane Irene.

The number of folks who are on board with the directory is too great to list and I'm even getting some short bios. Now if we can get photos, we're golden, besides our years. I'm busy setting up the pages, Linda's on research, Larry Delucca's on Alto Sax, and Bob Wanek is in St. Petes percolating with ideas for the directory (making work for me, but as I said in 1970, "He labors not who loves his labor". Talked with Linda Schall Kosinski who mentioned folks she knew were in North Carolina. We compared notes on that one.

I've had a few people express privacy concerns in providing email addresses. I want to point out that all that will be visible unless someone actually wants to send you an email is the message "click to send email". I am using a little piece of code that prevents Spam robots from scouring the page to collect email addresses. They specifically look for a format, somebody@something.com. If they don't see that, they can't get anything. Believe me, you're already out there. Try Googling yourself, and if you're on Facebook, well, some of us talk about vacations we're on right now, what we're having for lunch and so it goes. As I've said before, I balance privacy with my desire to be reachable. And short of the witness protection program, (which Dale Weber tried to convince his NC neighbors he was a part of) if you want to be reached by old friends and possible new ones, like some of the suggestions for Facebook friends that Linda and I have made, well, you have to be reachable.

On the flip side of the equation, this directory will make it much easier to find folks that are still not located. Almost to a person, folks that were "lost" were unaware that they were, and almost to a person, they asked about someone, or someone has asked about them and it's just great being able to provide information so old friends can rekindle their friendships. Likewise, it will be easier for us to find folks if you hear of anything that may help to locate them.

We are also initiating a Veterans page Those Who Served, so we can acknowledge our Armed Services veterans, so if you are, let me know what branch of service you were in and your dates of service. We will have a page that lists classmates in State order so that regional get-togethers will be simplified, should the classmates in that area choose to do so. One of my favorites is recognition of classmates who are Class Mates, married to their high school sweethearts of which there are many couples in our class. We are also going to have a Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes page to keep track of changes in Contact Information which we will try to update at least on a monthly basis depending on how many there are. And mentioned last because I don't like to think of it, is a Memorial page, In Memoriam, so we can remember our gone but not forgotten classmates of whom there are a few more from initial indications with the Social Security Administration. We found Patricia Mancuso listed as having passed away in July of 2002, and Ed Miller in November of 2002.

These are ideas that have come from your classmates, so if you think of something, please feel free to let us know by email or phone: milton.yuan@gmail.com and 812-457-7772.

A Good Weekend

We're now doing two things at once (with regard to WVHS  classmates that is. We're always multitasking with other stuff too - that's what grandparents do!)

First, we are having continuing success in locating both lost classmates and confirming contact information from the rest.

Second, we are continuing to get positive response from classmates we have directly contacted that they want to participate in the Class Directory. We get messages daily to be listed.

So who have we talked to this week? Doug Fowler is back in New England. George Dingfelder retired last week from L.L. Bean. He's still trying to figure out what he's supposed to do now. Nancy Conroy Infante is in Florida after leapfrogging a bunch.

The biggest discovery, after piecing together clues from her friends, was Barbara Williams Frederick who is in Sewell NJ. She was somewhat surprised to discover that I didn't end up as either a doctor, lawyer or indian chief and like all others NOT LOCATED, she was unaware that she was lost.

Barry Makepiece, from Fort Lauderdale, FL and I shared stories about little fisticuff bouts we both had with people now deceased back in high school. He also told me how his long friendship with William Gullone experienced a break a while back, until Bill made the effort to find Barry again. Barry reported the sad news to me that Walter Szpara had passed away quite a while ago (April  30, 2000 per SSDI) which also reminded me that Embers page 222 has about a dozen classmates who weren't available for class pictures. They will be listed in the Class Directory  however. Among them was John Chichin, Jr (dec. 1975).

Any clues provided by classmates are more reliable and helpful than random brute force searches, so if you heard of someone having moved, let us know. This will all become a lot easier once we launch the classmate search website, www.waynevalley67.com sometime next month. It will include a list of all of our classmates and whether we have found them or not, to start. That way everyone will know, and will be able to submit information that they may possess. Even rumors or "The last I heard, he was in ......." is better than not knowing at all. And best of all, someone lost may stumble upon the site and discover that they are among the lost and email us. Our phone coversations have turned up a lot of leads.  Does anyone have a lead on where Donna Rogers is? Marijo McDevitt Stas is inquiring. If you have a clue, let either me or Marijo know. The site will also have links to people search engines and other Wayne info sources.

Finally, for this installment anyway, Linda has been comparing the master classmate list and searching Facebook where she has found that more and more classmates are signing in. We will continue to get folks connected and aware that others have joined Facebook to increase the size of the WVHS community there.

More later. Geez. There are 70 David Pauls listings in New Jersey alone.

Questions and Answers; Not! And a Confirmation and a Suggestion

So Linda, my wife says, Milt, you've got to find out who is interested in being in the directory and what they want included. Why don't you ask them using a Facebook question. Not being familiar with the gizmo, I say, sure, why not. So I put together a basic question and added options. It went something like this:

Question: Do you want to be included in the Wayne Valley '67 Class Directory? What do you want included in your listing. It's your choice. Remember, distribution is to classmates only.


And then I added the following options:


Address
City
State
email
Facebook logo (to indicate that you're on Facebook
Short Bio

And folks, Diana Bonazza Koopman was the quickest on the draw to send back a response. That was great said I. This is going to be convenient and I'll have a single email acknowledgement for each classmate.

Then others started responding and instead of getting individual responses so I could tabulate them and make sure that their requirements were met in the directory, Lo and Behold, that's not the way it works. The Facebook question gadget works more like a poll, tabulating a cumulative answer and even though it posts a little profile pic next to the answers chosen, it is not clear if that is just that answer or an indicator that person responded. Not good enough for me. I do not want to include info that a classmate doesn't want included.

So we'll probably have to do this the non Facebook way, although Facebook email addresses (if I don't have regular ones) can still be utilized. I'll be sending an email with checkboxes that can be sent back to me. That way I'll have one form for every person responding and there will be less room for error. Besides which, there are still classmates who by whatever circumstance, are not online, and I'm enjoying my phone conversations too much not to pass up the opportunity to have another gab fest. I just have to remember to do the questionnaire with them.

So far, everyone has expressed great enthusiasm for the directory and the possibility of contacting others to whom their thoughts have strayed at one time or another.  Only two people, Joanne Taylerson and Ronda Roby, while happily telling me about what they've done these past years, expressed their desire to be listed only as alive and well, maintaining that they no longer have any real ties to the class. My response is that I respect their wishes, am so happy to be able to talk to them and learn that they are happy and well and on the topside of the dirt, and that the directory is electronic and can be changed instantly should they so choose to be listed more completely at sometime in the future.

So the lesson learned is this: Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

I spoke to Louie Lotz a few days ago, and confirmed that yes, indeed, he was a pastor of many years. We had a lengthy discussion wondering how it is that our perception of time changes as our relative position on the thread of life progresses; and how our desire to look back seems to increase as time moves on. I told him that I believe that it is because there is more to look back upon then there is up ahead, not to say that what's up ahead isn't worth looking forward to! He talked about a personal past of which I was not aware, and I realized that everyone from our high school past had an inner life that high school friendships usually did not penetrate or that was carefully concealed. It is only in retrospect that we discover we have come to terms with those demons. I'm delighted to hear that Louis too, has found his (I was going to say Lotz in life) place in the world and is in a good place.

There are some professions that can truly be a calling. Nursing, law enforcement, the ministry, and educators. I am personally glad that there are still those called to fill those shoes. I am proud to say that there are many in our class who have filled those ranks, and I feel elated to hear that is the road they decided to travel and privileged to know them.

Hey, I know I'm a johnny-come-lately to the classmate business. I know I would have known sooner if I had been more involved in class affairs. But I guess that is precisely the point that I have been making. It is never too late.

And my thanks to those of you who have been following the blog, responding so enthusastically, and those who have provided information. Oh yeah, and this to that one anonymous sole (sic) who commented "who needs more of your crap": I reply, reading blogs is voluntary. Anonymity is the shield of cowards, made ever so much more convenient by the Internet. If you don't want to read it, don't.

Finally, I heard from Bob Wanek down in FL, who after reading the blog, made a few constructive suggestions. One, as you can see, I am embolding names, and I will also at Bob's suggestion provide a listing of who I have located or not. I'll probably do this on a website, without contact information, just for a running progress report. If anyone wants to use it, once it is up and running, to help fill in some blanks, the more the merrier. The structure can then be used later, with contact info (which I've got on a separate spreadsheet), to publish the directory.

Serve, Volley, and a Classmate has an Idea

I sent along the latest batch of information on classmate locations to the committee the other day. In return I received a detailed response to each classmate which went, "knew that, knew that, knew that, updated, knew that, etc., etc. or something like that. I was told that Taisa Apanasow was not on the website (page 163) nor Bob Guzallis (page 222). Then separately, I received an email chiding me on an error on my part about Marlene Zachok who was mistakenly put on my "lost" list (actually, she's still lost to me), the gist of which is that the committee is the "official" keeper of class contact information and that while they appreciated finding out about people who were unfound, they don't appreciate that I said they didn't know where people were, once again putting words in my mouth. As regular readers of this blog know, that s one thing that does not need to be done. I've got plenty of my own. I have never said they didn't know where people are; rather I just said that if you don't outreach to keep updated, you will end up knowing less than you think you do.

Additionally and sadly, I was informed that Marion Borowsky had passed away which they acknowledged because her brother had contacted them directly. That was a head scratcher. Perhaps I should have Chris Mauriello contact them directly, or John Chichin Sr. Talking to me is not sufficient.

What the committee doesn't understand is that while this all started as an offer to help locate lost classmates, we've been on very different paths. I always encourage people to go, but it was never just about getting the people I found to go to the Reunion which is the committee's main focus. Reunion weekend. Once every 10 years and now 5 years. Based on the unexpected and unexplainably negative reaction my efforts have engendered, my purpose has shifted from just locating the lost to creating the Class Directory and, as it always was, reconnecting people - that can happen any day, anytime, as long as the information is available. For, dare I say it, seniors like ourselves, the days are getting shorter; the past is getting longer and we had better do it if we're going to do it at all.

So that being said, I was delighted to receive a return call from Dave Chicoine, now in Colorado. He said he went to the 30th (didn't know from the website - his name is bare of attendance dots). We had one of my now typical lengthy retrospective phone calls which ended in his trying to convince me that picking up the clarinet and sax again would be a worthy retirement activity. And take time away from talking to more classmates? Of course, we traded contact information.

I am also half way through a chit chat with Doug Senchak who has looking upstream toward a retirement home upriver from New York City. Doug's history seems nearly as twisty as my own, and we seemed, unbeknownst to each other, to have shared a lot of experiences on different coasts.

Finally, Mark Pinchal, shared with me a project he has been working on for quite a while:

When I first lived in Florida (1983-1999) I was deeply involved in conducting services for the Apollo 1 astronauts, in fact I started the whole thing in February, 1985 after I saw the movie "The Right Stuff". I got permission to place a wreath at Launch Complex 34 where the fire had taken place (1/27/1967). Thought it would be a 1 time thing but when I heard from the security guard I was the first to do something like that I vowed to keep returning until a proper service was a fact of life. In 1990 I had a plaque placed at the site, the first to honor Gus Grissom, Ed White and Roger Chaffee.  18 years of work, and the help and major input of like minded people, the service took on a life of its own. The people who joined made this possible and to them goes the lion's share of credit. I moved to Las Vegas in 1999 and after the 2003 service, I handed the service back to the families of the crew. Time and distance made it impractical for me to continue organizing and conducting it.

Having returned to Florida in March 2007, I have thought that there should be a day to honor all of America's Astronauts, past and present, in particular those who have the ultimate sacrifice. NASA does remember their fallen but this too negative. A day should be established to honor all who have risked their lives to expand our knowledge of the infinate universe in which we live. A Federal observance, like Flag Day. I've written a few letters to some senators and have heard nothing back. I have recommended 9 April as a possible date. It was on 9 April 1959 that America and the world first met the Mercury Astronauts. It would be nice to get it approved while some of them are still alive.

Now this is something especially close to people in Southern Indiana, since Gus Grissom was a native son, and highly honored in this region, so I mention it here as a way to help Mark publicize and lobby for this day. Far less significant events, IMHO, have been granted Federal recognition.


I've got to call Doug again, to finish where we left off. I've also sent some post cards to people whose addresses I think are correct but who have no phone numbers available to me.